A Thousand Splintering Questions

Where did I go wrong?

That in the shadow of your jaundiced eye,

You orphan me from you?

That I fail in whatever I try...

I close my eyes and pray by the light,

And wide-eyed, I dream at night...

Of a hope that will dawn upon and house me,

Not in its fragility, but, with its all encompassing might.

But, it stays away, only whimsically skirting the boundaries,

Permeating death and despair...

Moribund I lie, with no wish to heal,

In the ironical comfort that no will care...

And, I patiently wait for my end to near...

But between the thought and its action,

Evading my death is a malicious void,

That churns my inside with a thousand splintering questions.

And I ask,

Where did I go wrong?

That before I could be born, I died,

Why did you orphan me from you?

That I never got up to see the light...